Inspiration & Paradox 104: Stars Do Not Twinkle

As with most young children, my 3-year-old loves the song Twinkle Twinkle Little Stars.

But we know that stars do not twinkle. When we look at them through the telescopes, they appear as discrete, tiny points of light.

Stars only appear to twinkle. We are viewing them through the thick layers of the earth atmosphere. As we look at them, the light given off by them has to travel through the moving layers of the turbulent earth atmosphere to reach our eyes. When this happens, the light of the stars is bent or refracted in different directions, resulting in the twinkling effect that our eyes see.

Inspiration & Paradox 103: An Adult Trapped in a Child’s Body

Lately, I have been looking for my favourite cartoon again. Most of the people around me have not heard of it -- Mafalda, a character created by Argentine cartoonist Quino.

Why do I find this 5-year-old girl so remarkable? She makes me laugh.

Patriotic, deeply concerned about humanity, human rights, and world peace, Mafalda is super-quirky, always posing awkward questions to her parents and friends. I adore her pure innocence, child-like temperament, and marvel at her strong character and sharpness of a grown-up thinking all at the same time. “An adult trapped in a child’s body” is how I describe her. She doesn’t try to be funny or even thinks she is funny, she is just funny! While her thoughts do evoke some very serious thinking about the ills of society, how the messages are crafted and delivered and the humour that comes with them will make you rock. Also, her bunch of quirky little friends (businessman, rich mummy wannabe, dreamer, and rebel) is a big attraction to me as well!

If you like comics, I highly recommend Malfada to you. It's translated into only a few languages though, and English is not one of them.

Inspiration & Paradox 102: The Older We Get, The More Lost We Feel

This comic strip by Scotts Stantis was published in the papers in 1995. It says in the first picture "WHAT AM I GOING TO BE WHEN I GROW UP?", and in the second, "I'M GROWN UP AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'M DOING." Then in my early twenties, I thought what was depicted was funny but very real, so I made a cutting to keep it. Today, after more than 10 years, I saw it again while doing some housekeeping. The same sentiments somehow came back...

Inspiration & Paradox 101: Children Without Limits Feel Limited

Time and again, I have been told that we need to know how to discipline our children, especially when they are young. One revelation that really stands out to me is, “Our children expect us to punish them when they misbehave, and when we fail to do that, they tend to feel insecure and afraid.”

How very true this is! Yes, all children do fear disciplining parents and want to run away from the punishments meted out. Yes, they hope and even beg that they be spared of their wrongdoing; however, when we let them go scot free every time they err, overtime, they form an impression of us – weak, irresponsible, and unsure parents. And when they live under a perceivably weak authority that fails to teach and show them the boundaries and limits in life, they grow up lacking a sense of being protected, a sense of security.

Interesting, isn’t it. Lesson gleaned: Rules keep us safe.

Inspiration & Paradox 100: Circumstances Make or Reveal Us?

Look at this pot of Prickly Pear Cactus. It’s desperately reaching out for the sunlight in my balcony and the shape of its pad has also evolved into some strange-looking thin and long strip. I’ve been thinking lately…if I had left the pot in a different corner, would it grow the same way like now?

Do circumstances make us what we are or reveal who we are?

Inspiration & Paradox 99: Every Ending is a Start

The standard answer to the people who have asked me why I left my job was I have chosen to spend more time to raise my kids by taking up a part-time role instead. It’s a brief response, but a truthful one. Recording in black and white my feelings about important journeys in my life always helps me in a way come to terms with things. I figure it’s a sense of closure, a sense of completeness; a sense of urgency to start a new journey. It’s a way of therapy, getting in touch with myself. And this is what I will do now, dropping that “period” as the chapter ends.

Part of the truth also has to be that I have come to a cross road after 8 years in the same place and function, where I feel I want to make a different choice in life. I guess at some point in time, you just want to make a turn and find a fresh start somewhere because riding on the same old road gets scarier and scarier. It just gets too comfortable each year. I need to feel that I am progressing, not in monetary rewards, but in my knowledge and experience as a human. Staying where I am does not make me contented anymore. I think I had made my contribution, and want to be able contribute elsewhere. Well, it’s not true that the job was not demanding anymore, it was still, but I just know the boundaries of the job too well, what I could do and influence and what I could not. I think it’s very correct when people say “once the real passion and vision for the job is gone, it’s time to leave”. It’s hard to admit it, but I think that has happened to me.

Now I need to figure how to work on my new beginnings and am very curious how my life would come together again after this.

Inspiration & Paradox 98: The Cheap Bubble

Shopping has become an emotional experience for a lot of people.

Many of us get into a habit of scouting and sniffing out for sales and buying cheap clothing, shoes, bags, and etc. The thrill of shopping at discounted prices and getting more for the buck has gotten us into this addiction of buying and stocking up cheap deals we don’t need most of the time. On one hand, our shopping behaviour thrives on discovering good bargains, on the other, it seems that we never really consider if we are really benefiting in terms of saving money or spending even more on unnecessary stuff.

Inspiration & Paradox 97: Stop Looking For Trouble

The massive daily news on the gloom and doom of the economy is getting on my nerves. Reports of people cutting back on expenses, making ends meet, joblessness, failing businesses, deep pay cuts, restructuring and downsizing are all making wonder if I was too stupid to quit my job now, why didn’t I decide to just cling on to it for another one or two years and see how things move first….I hate these news, I don’t like the fact that they are making me feel wavered about something which I was very sure about, the future and my family financial security. What if Jason’s business gets hit by this economic crisis? Now stop it…cut out all the What Ifs, stop looking for trouble in the future, live in the present, think positively of new possibilities with my resignation, the work I am going to do, the time I would have after I leave my job in Jan next year...

Keep Your Spirits Up & Have a Blessed 2009!

"Anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, but only empties today of its strength."
Spurgeon, Charles Haddon

"The worst thing you can possibly do is worrying and thinking about what you could have done."
Lichtenberg, Georg C.

"Worry gives a small thing a big shadow."
Proverb, Swedish

Inspiration & Paradox 96: Latest Beauty Buzz is to Get Eaten Alive by Fish

Yes, you know I’m talking about the peculiar skin treatment - Fish Spa.

When the legs are dipped into the pool, it's totally free of pain, but downright exhilarating, extremely ticklish. I had to slap my own face to keep my legs in the water as hundreds of these little fish rushed over to nibble and bite relentlessly, but the good news is, after a while you just got immune to the sensation, and then it became kind of therapeutic.

Garra Ruffa, also nicknamed doctor fish, is a small flesh-eating tropical fish now popularly used for treating skin diseases such as psoriasis blotches, flaky and crusty skin, and scabby epidermis. Once found in the lowly river basins of Turkey, they’re now a highly sought after fish in the fish spa markets of Korea, Japan, Malaysia, China and Singapore and are very expensive due to strict importation and exportation regulations. When placed in the spa, these Garra Ruffa fish feed themselves on the dead cells of the human body, leaving the healthy skin of the human body to grow. They not only remove dead skin cells, but also massage the skin and improve blood circulation. It's believed that when the skin is better supplied with oxygen, it becomes softer and smoother!

Inspiration & Paradox 95: When You Can't Gel Personality and Behaviour

Yesterday, while I was scurrying across the road with my two daughters in Orchard Road, making sure that we could beat the traffic light, I spotted a colleague in front of us. And as I was about to bid hello to him, he did something which I think I would remember for a long time…

You have to understand this, in the office, he is known to be an irate, brutish, heavy-handed, unrelenting guy whom most people don’t fancy working with in projects. Never, never did I expect him to do this… A granny was waving packets of tissue papers under the traffic light. When he saw her, he stopped dashing forward, turned around, and brisked up towards the old lady and hurriedly handed over a dollar coin, and when the three packets of tissue paper were dished out to him, he dismissed them with a quick signal of his hand. And before I could catch his attention, he had already scampered across the turning-red traffic lights and disappeared into the thronging crowd.

As people are writing to the papers to “remove” from the streets these people who simply are eking out a living in between the lives of others in the name of protecting the positive image of this affluent city, what this guy did, his compassionate gesture has certainly shocked me. Who would imagine such a roughshod personality to display such a tender-hearted act of kindness towards a total stranger?

Have we been judging too hard on people’s behavior and character? Don’t these hard-faces, people who consistently appear rude and unfriendly but can surprise you with a kind act deserve a million times of our respect than those double-faces who are consistently sweet and nice but can surprise you with a nasty stab from behind?

Inspiration & Paradox 94: Economy Down, Sales Up!

On 13 June 2008, Times Online published an article entitled "Rise in champagne sales is sign of recession" that began with this "Champagne sales have increased in Ireland which, according to an economic paradox, signals the country is heading for a recession."

Market researchers explained that with dwindling spending power during a recesion, consumers like to find small ways to cheer themselves up. When finances can’t stretch to big ticket-items like house renovation, cars and long holidays, they will always find money for less expensive treats such as sunglasses, nail varnish, lipstick or chocolate.

So, how true is this syndrome for you?

Inspiration & Paradox 93: When I am big, He is small

Truths learnt from Ed Welch's book:

• When people are big, God is small.
• Need other people less, love other people more.

Inspiration & Paradox 92: Whoever Makes the Most Mistakes Wins

Rather than cripple, failure can strengthen. Depending on how we respond to them, blows can shatter us as if we were a cheap clay pot or temper us as they would steel.

~ Unknown Quote from Whoever Makes the Most Mistakes Wins: The Paradox of Innovation

Inspiration & Paradox 91: Change is really good...but no thanks!

Dilbert's View of "Change".
Is it yours too?

Change is Great!!!

You go first.

Inspiration & Paradox 90: The tension between strength and flexibility in learning ballet

My older daugher Jerrie faces some challenges when doing the stretching exercises during her ballet class, whereas Jackie, my younger daughter has an amazingly flexible body, which seems to be perfect for learning gymnastics. Yesterday, I had the opportunity to talk to their ballet teacher and learn a little bit about ballet.

The beauty of ballet is in striking a fine balance between strength and flexibility. The challenge here is that these two forces counter each other. It's easy to find a very strong person who is not so flexible or an extremely flexible person who is not so strong, but the strongest and most flexible person does not exist. A good ballet dancer has to find that harmony between strength and flexibility so that he/she is able to bend the body to achieve certain art forms and techniques and at the same time has enough muscle power to achieve them.

Inspiration & Paradox 89: Sleep and Lose Weight

“A daily spoonful or two of honey taken prior to bedtime can help us sleep better and lose weight at the same time”.

Now, I expect what I just said to stir up an upheaval of emotions for most of you. How can something so sweet be any good when you are closely watching your weight? Doesn’t it sound all too stupid to consume more calories before you sleep when you are trying all day to lose weight and reduce calories in your meals? Doesn’t everyone know that our body metabolism rate at night is low, so we should avoid eating too late if we want a flat tummy? Surely, this must be one of those baseless old wives’ tales about dieting or some quick fix that’s central to all fad diets. More in... How to Sleep and Lose Weight at the Same Time?

Inspiration & Paradox 88: Expert Knows the Limit

The more we know, the less we understand.

"My definition of an expert in any field is a person who knows enough about what's really going on to be scared." (P.J. Plauger, Computer Language, 1983)

Inspiration & Paradox 87: What isn’t part of yourselves doesn’t disturb us.

How much does this make sense to you?

“If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isn’t part of yourselves doesn’t disturb us.” —Hermann Hesse

Inspiration & Paradox 86: Gaining and Losing at the Same Time

"It is one of the paradoxes of success that the things and ways which got you there are seldom those things that keep you there."~ Charles Handy

"For everything you gain, you lose something."~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

"Most of us plateau when we lose the tension between where we are and where we ought to be."~ John Gardiner

Inspiration & Paradox 85: Deadly Poison Now A Hot Favourite

Botulism toxin, one of the world's deadly killers, today has become a favourite cosmetic treatment called “Botox”, amongst thousands and thousands of mainstream people. A growing number of people are not only going for the cosmetic surgery but are now getting the treatment as festive and birthday gifts for family and friends.

No longer the preserve of Hollywood stars only, this famous poison in the diluted form is injected into the skin to weaken the facial muscles that control wrinkling. The Botox effect gradually wears off so repeat injections are required in about four months.

Where’s the common sense that it’s totally unnatural to inject a toxic chemical into the body? Common sense it’s not so common, I suppose...

"We are all born mad and some of us remain so!" Samuel Beckett